Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
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