I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?