just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Randomize
