wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
