so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
