i always forget guys have bellybuttons
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I'm like, not good at living.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
