how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Randomize
