did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
