You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
