so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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