How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
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