It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize