Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
jump out the window naked night went bad
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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