just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
