Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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