He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize