I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
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is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
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she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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