Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
