when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
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