And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
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