How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize