The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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