So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize