Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
