I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
