NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize