You made me cry and you don't even care
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
