The maid of honor just puked.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
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