I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
