You're completely useless in the revolution.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
