The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
