We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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