Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize