No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
