That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
