that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
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Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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