Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
