He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
