Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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