i permit you to call me
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize