I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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