Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize