well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
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Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
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He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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