Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The struggles of a small town man whore
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
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