apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
