Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Redeem this text for a blowjob
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
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