i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
