Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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