Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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