I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
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