found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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